Divorce and Domestic Violence
How does Domestic Violence (DV) affect divorce?
Domestic Violence doesn't prevent you from being granted a divorce in no-fault states, but heavily impacts child custody, spousal support, and asset division. Courts prioritize victim protection.
In California the state expanded definitions beyond physical abuse to include “coercive control” / financial manipulation, isolation tactics, and reproductive coercion, reflecting modern understanding of psychological warfare in relationships.(link)
What are the signs of Domestic Violence?
While some signs are overt, others can be subtle, making it essential to be aware of the various forms this abuse can take. Here are some key indicators:
Physical Signs: Unexplained injuries such as bruises, cuts, or broken bones. The person may offer unlikely explanations or wearclothing that covers these injuries, even in warm weather, as a way to hide them.
Emotional and Psychological Signs:
Sudden changes in behavior or personality, such as becoming withdrawn, anxious, or excessively apologetic.
Low self-esteem, especially if the individual was previously confident.
Unexplained fearfulness or nervousness, especially around their partner.
Social Signs:
Isolation from friends and family. The person may cancel plans frequently or seem to be under constant surveillance by their partner.
A noticeable change in social habits, like suddenly stopping activities they used to enjoy.
Financial Signs:
Having limited access to money or being unable to make financial decisions without their partner's approval.
Sudden employment changes or being forced to quit a job.
Control and Coercion:
The partner may exhibit controlling behavior, dictating what the victim can or cannot do, who they can see, or where they can go.
Monitoring their partner's phone, email, or social media accounts without permission.
Recognizing these signs and reaching out with support can make a significant difference. If you or someone you know is experiencing these indicators, it’s important to approach the situation with empathy and provide resources such as hotlines or local support groups.
On our episode with Leann Lazar we dive deep into the realities of getting a restraining order and how domestic violence can impact a divorce proceeding. Together, Demetria and LeAnn unpack the intersection of trauma, legal strategy, and survival planning, offering support and actionable guidance for those experiencing abuse or trying to heal from it.
Listen to full episode :